Best Foot Forward

So, I get up the other day and make my way to the chiropractor before work. I stop at Wawa to get money from the ATM and pull into the Dr.'s driveway with 5 minutes to spare. I trek up the stairs passing a small crowd of patients who are waiting for various practitioners. I greet Donna at the desk, and pick out a magazine, nodding politely as a man passes me to leave the office. I make myself comfortable, slinging my purse on the chair next to me and opening whatever trivial piece of literature I have chosen. I then wait for 20 minutes; Dr. Trish is running late today.

I try to focus on a mildly interesting article, but find it difficult as the receptionist with her booming voice, engages the gentleman in the chair opposite me in rather obnoxious, inane banter. Occasionally he glances at the floor and back up at me. It gets annoying that I have to repeatedly form a weak grin when my eyes catch his. I think, "Stop looking at me."

Then Donna announces, "Nora, room one is ready." Picking up my purse, I move to the first room and wait for a few minutes for Dr. Trish to open the door and greet me. "How's the baby today? How's your back feeling?" I respond with the usual, "Everything's fine."

I climb onto the table and assume the position on my right side. She grabs my hips and legs and Crack. I roll over and she repeats on my left side.

Now, you may be wondering why I am boring you all with such mundane telling of a typical Monday morning for me. But I'm doing so, because it's just as I roll onto my back and close my eyes, readying myself for the short neck rub that will be followed by the awkward snapping of my neck when Dr. Trish, who is sitting with my head basically in her lap, leans down and whispers timidly, "Um, do you realize you are wearing 2 different shoes?"

My already closed eyes clench in embarrassment. I can't even laugh yet. I have only 2 pairs of shoes that I currently wear to work because they are flats and I bought them for the pregnancy, one size too big in case my feet swell. One is brown, one is black, and the styles couldn't be more different . I lift my head and look, wincing at my feet. I start to awkwardly laugh and a hand comes to my head, "I have never done this before. I am so embarrassed!" She giggles and continues with the procedure, even offering to loan me a pair of shoes from the office since she knows that I have to get to work, and I'm sure it hasn't slipped past her that she started on me 20 minutes late. I tell her no, that I can get home in time (I can't).

As soon as she is out of the room I gather my purse and make a bee line to the receptionist. Generally there is a 30second exchange where I confirm my next appointment and sometimes I pay. There is generally one other person in the waiting room, maybe two. But of course, not today. No.

Today, there are 6 people in a waiting room that seats nine. There is a new receptionist at the desk who is being trained. In a desperate, and I'm sure completely ineffective attempt to mask my blunder, I face completely to the desk and rest my right toe on the floor, exposing the sole of the shoe to the other patients. This new woman, doesn't know how much I owe, or where to find the appointment book on the schedule (I always come on the same days at the same time). This should only be a formality, but since she is new, she wants to get it right. I kindly smile and assure her that I'm in no rush (I'm already 10 minutes late for work if I speed back to my house).

Finally she smiles and says, "Oh, there you are." I nod and say goodbye and fly out of the room. I race down the stairs and jump into the safety of my car.

Now, is it me, because I am hormonal, or perhaps, because I'm Nora, or wouldn't the rest of you find this experience absolutely mortifying?!?